i don't really dare to look at the clock now.

but i got to wake up at 6.30 tmr morning. and i have no idea why i am still up. can't sleep.
not as if its my wedding. its my aunt's!

perhaps its the coffee just now. sheesh.

munching cookies baked by jorris.. absolutely scruMpolicious. hahaahahhas!

don't you find the world warp?

why is it that things like the SIT video saga can spread like a plague, without much effort, everyone has seen it, heard about it, understand it.

Why won't their hearts be as open to the Truth, the Living Word?

i think its all about Desire. when u desire for something, u go for it.

told u. Man are hard-to-understand creatures.

praise the LORD!

i really felt like crying just now. seriously. like i can feel the intense fear gripping my heart.

nothing big actually. but i really felt cold all over.

i thought i lost the word document!

and i really stayed up to do..i was half dying staring at the screen. i recall the experience as r.e.p.u.l.s.i.v.e.

and the idea of RE-DOING wasnt exact fantastic. and the deadline for this epractical is like..today?

and in my hopelessness..i jus kept mumbling to God..and kept shaking my thighs and biting my lips..

mx's nervous breakdown symptoms. hahas.

yeah and i can laugh now. cos i found it! thanks Ceyu!!! so IT savvy. a call away!!

Praise the Lord. phew. i promise, i will SAVE, EMAIL and SAVE EVERYWHERE my assignments the next time round.

i have a weak heart.

i know i am a bit lagggg..

but..

i just realised..

corrinne may blogs. hahahas.

www.corrinnemay.blogspot.com. :)

and i am dying from doing the home and comm e practical. my eyes cannot take it already.

but..

do i have a choice?

No.

So?

back to work. enough of corrinnemay.

...............

saw this on xuan's bloggg. JOhari window! i just learnt this in jo's lesson. ;)

come come. friends. do this for me. gam sia. :) hahhahhas.

http://kevan.org/johari?name=-mx

so blessed today!

shareen gave me a box, with cute pics of cows on it!

and deb surprised me with a huge stuffed cow when we went home tog!

Thanks dears!

went for teh tarik with huimei, joella, huishan, deb, hannah and jiahui. after dinner today ;)

was supposed to discuss with huimei abt the upcoming unit CG. and the conversation drifted to about relationships, about life partners..hahaha (tt's how far women can digress, for ur info. ;) )

and inevitably, we started sharing about what kind of character are we looking for in our life partners. and seriously, i think night time breeds openness. hehs.

and as i was walking home just now, i was very reminded of cm's song- mr. beasley.

the song may sound kind of silly, but its so real. and i think the song really brings out the essence of my thoughts as well. hahas.

the essence of "being urself".

was sharing to huimei, that admist the ideal characteristics of my life partner, i am looking for someone who can make me feel that i am being "myself" when with him, and he too, is comfortable for being himself.

dunno why, but this is a v impt factor for me.

so with vday coming up, this's song for ur listening ear. enjoy ;)

M R . B E A S L E Y
Written by Corrinne May Ying Foo
Copyright 1997, Corrmay Gourmet Music (ASCAP)
You don't have to drive a fancy car
Don't have to quote me Shakespeare just to woo me
Yeah I see your nervous laughter when you're trying to crack some joke
Well, you don't fool me
I'd like to see your eyes through those goggles that you're wearing
Don't try to hide away

Just be yourself, Mr. Beasley
I don't need your show of attitude
Coz' it's your soul that makes me fall in love with you

You don't know this but I see you in the church when you are praying,
You just move me
And my friend Sue she tells me you've been teaching kids for free
Mr. Philanthropy
I'd like to see your eyes through those goggles that you're wearing
Don't try to hide away

Just be yourself, Mr. Beasley
I don't need your show of attitude
Coz' it's your soul that makes me fall in love with you
Be yourself, Mr. Beasley
I don't need your show of attitude
Coz' it's your soul that makes me fall in love with you

I'd like to see your eyes through those goggles that you're wearing
Don't try to hide away

sometimes, as i walk along the streets or anywhere, alone, with busy bustle passing me by,

or even as i am squeezing with people back to back on trains.

in lifts with fellow campus mates.

sitting beside a girl of my age on a bus.

walking out of school, with chattering campus mates in front of me. and the list goes on and on....

i wonder,

"who will i be today, if i hadn't known Him?"

i was trying to picture myself, my life priorities, my interest, and how i would spend my time..

haven really had a conclusion as yet.

but one thing i'm definite of as of now, i will never have the willingness to attempt things which tests my comfort zone, which threatens my security if i hadnt known Him. i m very sure of that.

I am very thankful for Him living in me, a living and divine security in which i can build my life upon.

and its simply because of this identity as a child of God, i came to see myself trying things in which i would have stood in fear facing , if i hadnt known Him.

and it doesnt mean that i experience success everytime i take that step of faith and try as well.

but amazingly, u just have the assurance that this is not the end of, but the process of experiencing His presence and power in your life.

gd nights. ;)