sometimes..i really wish to live in denial..
i just refuse to looooook at the things i have to complete.
sch's madness..i tell u.
but somehow, admist the stress, i have this assurance tt things r still in control..
Yup. HE is in control. :)
i may be living a busy life...but hopefully..i ll not fall into the trap of a hurried life.

yeps. theres always time for everything. tt's y u have been put a steward for that. i rem someone telling me tt.. ;)

did i mention i went to little india last night for dinner? an uber different experience i ever had..OK maybe not to the extent of 'ever had'..but i really had a lot of different tots when i was there, from the moment i stepped out of little india mrt station. k..the story goes..

well, not even having to look at the board, i knew when to alight, by looking at the 'passenger grp' tt alighted at tt particular train station..so here i m, with xuan..blindly following the crowd. we could almost pass off as tourists..cos the cannot-make-it us had to check the board for specific exits so as to plan our route. so..we decided to start off w tekka market exit..

n my ol' my..i was really overwhelmed by the NUMBER of people on the streets (or should i say males..) was quite taken aback..cos i din really quite rem seeing so many ppl in little india the other time i came! *must be a sunday evening..tt's y* i tot. so gung-ho-ly (or so i tot), we walked thru the crowds.

n pls laugh at us..cos of our weak stomachs tt day..we ate BURGER KING at little india. wow. i jus cant believe it. i know i know..we will be more adventurous the nx time we go..amazingly..BK was really empty. so 2nd observation: perhaps indians don't really go for burger king?

k..back to my story. aft dinner..had our first few 'tourist' snapshots of little india. night was falling..n my heart was pumping faster. hmm...but having the heart to explore..we headed off to explore the little shops n funny streeets.. i tell u..i was so reminded of an episode of amazing race..hurhur. i tot really..i m in a simulated environment mans.

well..was an ultra eye-opener n i wld say...mind-opener as well. i really realised new comfort zones tt i hav within me. i mean of cos..i may look gung-ho at times..but i know inwardly i m a HUM. well..looks can be deceiving..

many tots. was thinking how m i gg to survive if i should church plant in a similar environment in future? when the ratio of my race to the other is like 1 to a few hundreds or perhaps..thousands in tt area? how did i manage the looks fr the others cos i look different? n naturally..the roads which i promise i will NEVER drive in cos..i suppose once u get in..u need an hr to get out fr the other side.

food! n the language! n many many more! was commenting to xuan tt did we realise tt we actually communicated in chi almost thruout the whole lil india journey. hehs. tho we normally chat in eng. hahas. concluded tt we felt safer in chi..tt not many ard us would hav understood..andtry standing in close proximity of one inch with a stranger n start chatting w ur fren. trust me..its different. its stress. hahahas.

of cos..i wasnt the one taking photos. i m a HUM, rem? i was almost clinging to my belongings while gung-ho xuan snapped happily w the digi cam..pics of buildings..pics of road signs..pics of unique shops..all i can understand..but pics of fruits n veg?! bahs..

anyways, had a gd time of discovery by my little india trip. saw many vcds with words i din understand..peered over many provision shops tt sold herbs or spices tt ive nv seen before..or even internet cafes tt r giving such fantastic rates..hehs. orhhhh..n of cos..the lights n lamps which r all so unique..the shoes n cushion covers which i think r v..erms..i dunno how to describe..jus v 'ethnic'. i jus think i need more of such exposure la.

so..kampong glam. u're nx. :) hehes.

thinking y m i M.I.A-ing fr blogging for quite some time...yeah cos i have nowhere to blog except in sch for the past wk..hahas. anyways, not having a com/lapp with u at home is a good training time to be more time-sensitive n to REALLY REALLY discipline myself from spending time online..to make sure all tech-y stuff are done in sch before i get home. felt really CUT out fr the world to a certain extent..but paradoxically.. i think i did more stuff..hehs.
n good! jus had a prayer answered!! the acer lap will be ready for collection by this thurs..Phewwww.. great great great.. not 14 days afterall! i m finally ending my caveman days. thnx woman for helping me out in buying n collection!!! hehs.
yeah n it was a battle between choosing fujit or acer..but well..i cant care much already..so as long i have something working NOW. n i guess regardless of how hardy its supposed to be..it will still suffer in the poor hands of the owner..yeah.. n tt's me. *guilt-stricken*
i need some crash course on "how to take care of ur lapps" basically.. anyone offering me tt? ;)
had a mini housewarming buffet for my paternal side on sat @ my place..not bad. turn up was quite gd..but i was really worried for my dad when i came home fr church..i saw the amt of food remaining was thinking..'uh-oh..dad's in trouble..' hahas cos basically my dad n mum had a hard time deciding on the amt of food to order..n my dad's a 'rather-over-order' guy n my mum's a 'i-dun-think-ppl-r-HUGE-eaters' person.. so oh wells. but thankfully my mum's too pre-occupied to strangle my dad that night.. n all i can help was to eat as much as i possibly could..or smuggle many plates to my room..hurhur..
it was also a gd time to let some of my relatives tt werent tt close to me to know of my faith..i braced myself up for tt actually..knew it was coming cos of the deco/ornaments i have in the room. regardless of how they took it within their hearts, i'm jus glad i had this chance to have a 'mini-declaration' somehow.
my grann stayed over for the night! shes such a hardy lady u know!! n my sis n i were commenting how sweet she is. a really cool gran i would say. someone who is 98, not on any walking aides, fully alert..n is sooooo cute! hahahs! cos of her hearing probs, she literally leaned over the tea-table and was jus 2 cm away fr my dad's face to talk to him! i really laughed till i dropped can..she's so so cute..
but putting all these aside..i felt a tinge of..i dunno..sadness? i jus felt that i could have done something more in the past..something like to try to get to know her better..brush up my teochew..n all the things i possibly couldve done..as she left my hse for hm..i jus had the feelings of regret of the things i hadnt done.. but well, not time for regrets isnt it.
so current plan..sis and me shall visit her once a wk with dad..i think we can really start off w tt first. ;)
i m really thankful for who i hav in my fam. esp my dad..my mum. n maybe sis! hahahhas.
count my blessings. ;)

jus drafted out the plan for CG tmr..trying something different..woo.. hhahas
its a prayer cg..something which i took quite some time to plan.. i hope huimei gives the go ahead! let me psycho her..hahhas!
alrighty..got tons of work becking me. byeee!

my whole world crashed...when u just left me like that..
i m feeling so helpless..n handicapped without u..
realised that i have been taking u for granted all these while...
abused u...misuse u..overworked u till wee hrs of the night...
sorry my dear...is time we part.
time for someone new..to replace u in my heart. (eh..it rhymes..hahahs)
i'm sorry i've to let u go..
thanks for supporting me and being so efficient for the past 4 years..
i ll remember u for the many things u have helped me achieved..
u've been so faithful.
thanks dear. i'll miss u..
byee...my nec versalite lappiee.... *weeeps.
IT CRASHED ON ME!!!!!

i never everrrrrrrr imagine elective to be that tiring can.
not mentally tiring...
is PHYSICALLY challenging..used up all the little whatever strength i have for a friday.
the sun was scorching..but at least we played games today.. not some boring conditioning
the captain's ball game was hilarious tho'..cos of this really cute nursing girl... hahas. i was laughing more than trying to run for the ball.. hehs
got to scoot for ywca now. hope the kids r not a pain today..unlikely tho.. argh..hahahS! byeee!:)

just finished compiling the list of birthdays of my whole cohort. HAhas. birthday rep. and i must say few people believe theres really a rep position of BIRTHDAY in my class. c'mon i'm not lying k. i m into welfare. hahaha! :)

oo..and my neighbours finally shifted in this afternoon. a middle age couple..the husband's a foreigner n wife's a chi. haha friendly peeps. heard fr my mum tt the auntie works in some healthcare sector. haha!! cool man. finally all the 3 units on my side r occupied. :)

caught up with reg this evening. to town and walked ard. hahas! it's such a nice nua-ed evening. the streets were walkable and not much of a crowd. we like tt. just talked and talked..and talked. hahas. long time nv get to catch up with this woman already. glad i was able to make some time out today!

of cos..we will nv fail to talk abt anything under the sun. hahas. but interestingly, we brought up some noticeable trends tt we both observed on our own and had some mini discussion.

well..not new. abt many pppl of our age getting into relationships..out again..in again..and stuff of these.

we were just wondering..is there really..LOVE in all these fragile relationships tt many of our peers r holding? or is it sometimes..pure lust? hmm..of cos we cant really come to a conclusion. but one thing we know..it all starts out with man wanting to fill up the lonliness in their hearts with something..or rather..someone.

and of cos, it's speaks volume of how many ppl ard us r jus together suddenly..or they have found themselves a partner THAT fast. wow. both me and reg were pretty amazed u know. hahas.

i was just commenting to reg tt telling others that u r single at 20 still is like a "WOW?!? R U SERIOUS??" affair today know. hahas. quote shera..welcome to the LOTS club..[left.on.the.shelf]. :P

yeah la. with regina..the topics will include marriage one la. she dreams of having kids and aspires to be a housewife right..woman?? hahas.

but we r really thankful for this unconditional love that both of us have found in Him..tho' we may be alone physically many times..we r nv lonely. :)

sounds cliche. but it's true to both of us at least. yups woman..i'll be ur future kids' part-time nannnny...HAHAS. hey..arent u amazed at our really funny friendship? hahas. as i was on the train jus now..i cant help but really thank God for this amazing friend tt i hav found in a..really weird manner? hahas. like what u say..we werent even really aware of each others presence in cedar..until somewhere in sec 4 where we dreamt to be SAjc girls tog. hehs. u hav ur reasons of wanting to be in a missionary sch at least once in ur lifetime..and for me...my agenda was to 'seek' more answers in christian faith i guess.. n i tot SA wld be a perfect environment to do so..i mean of cos 'you-know-what' plays a major role den. but i m thoroughly amazed at how God brought me thru this journey of finding more abt Him..and eventually accepting Him into my life as i look back! really..it cant be coincidence tt i chose AJ instead..n woman u came along too. HAHA. aj is such an IMPOSSIBLE place to discover more abt God, i tot den. but i was proven wrong..well.. so wrong. :)

God has his perfect timing. this i know so fully well.. as someone who din know him in those days..i fit the description fully of someone who 'knows about God and not knowing God' perfectly.. i embrace this personal relationship i hav with Him..cos it din come easy. n many times..i do remind myself of this whenever i m upset or disappointed in Him. But He is always there to gently remind me of my identity in Him. tho' i wld say i'm stilll so imperfect now..He nv sees me as someone incapable of changes for the better..by His grace of cos.

thanks for everything Lord. u've made everything so much clearer n possible. :)

some snap shots..















Hosting of the japanese students last tues! fr seirei christopher college in hamamatsu. :) top: grp photo! [erm..did u guys kind of notice the male-female ratio in our course..hahas.]


below: noriko n mee..at lau pat sat for dinner for the social outing.



























above: nizar n hua beng!! singing 'rasa sayang' to the japanese girls!! hahahs! huabeng's fr m'sia..so stronger command in malay. tho he's a chi. amusing la he..hahhas! i nv imagine a lecturer doing tt. for the sake of entertainment..he sacrificed. hahas!

wellwell..shall leave an entry abt the experience if i have the time..for now..let the pics tell u the story! ;) (tho not many to begin with in the first place..i m lazy w uploading. hahahas. ;) )

listening: corrinne may-stay on the road.

i can nv get sick of listening to her songs. nv. really. hahas.

nights world. :)

yeah.guess this shall be my 'permanent' place to jot my thots down i guess? hahas. i miss FOD a lil still tho'. but to make things easier for my friends..i shall make the sacrifice. :P

just make do with this blogg yeah my frens. reireiZ!! what u think of this now?oh wells. i got to get used to it. since i ve been an old faithful user of the 'old-nice-little-comfortable-nv-fail-me-open-diary' for like donkey years. time for a change. hehs.

hmm...i love rainbows. they remind me of God's everunchanging and unfailing promises. :) i rem watching amazing race once..where one of the contestants saw a rainbow fr the helicopter..n commented..rainbows are there to remind us of God's promises. yeps..beautiful things to remind us of His faithfulness. ;)

had service today once again! i have a new team leader for hoperesources! guess who?

*drumsrolllll*

Shuyi!!

yeps. its been quite some time since i last served with her. but its really amazing to work tog again with her. n tog with jitsy. it really reminds me of the pre-tertiary days! wow..i really cant help but praise God for His different plans for each and every one of us. me shuyi n jitsy r currently all serving in diff campuses..and i m really encouraged by this girl shuyi.. from the cute little girl i've known like 2 yrs back..still a raw pie in NJ..to a really young mature lady who is all raring to do more for Him, taking care of His flock! :) inspired by her life!

service was ministering..at least i felt so personally. tried reading what i wrote on the black card when i got home..but erms..so decided to rewrite it on my whiteboard in the room instead. serves as a reminder to me anyway isn't it? ;)

had a good longggg chatting session with deb aft svc. was gd. really gd time. agree deb? aiya..bet u ll differ..hahhas! well. .we were quite unfortunate in a sense..cos evertime we start to pray..some auntie will come over and clear stuff..chat a while..or even to the point of 'pleading' us to leave starhub. hahas! i love the times when we really pray tog for ppl..for ourselves. simple prayers..but i know God hears em. :) shared with her my times since i was a christian..how i really really struggled in the beginning..and how i come to see my personal comfort zones. while waiting for her bus.. i asked her abt her future plans aft she grad. HAHAS!!

oh mans. thinking of it tickkkkkkles me like mad! she tot of wanting to be an....*** **********!

ok i shall protect this covenant...interested parties..pls approach her yeah. ;) deb..i hav definitely learnt a lot fr u..perhaps in ways in which u din realise. blessed by this covenant tt we share. n of cos many times in which u made me realised what a person i actually m. hahas! yeah yeah..i will try not to WALK in front of u guys ok...i m TRYING! hahahahahas.

n thanks for the many times u bear me in love. thank God for u. ;)